bad behavior - Musings Out Loud

bad behavior

A collection of 3 posts

The Lie

I could not handle the day. I had no energy. It was one of those days where I simultaneously expect the world to be accommodating, and know that they will not understand. Too many weights on my shoulders about the future, and too many triggers this week about the past.

Anger

I cannot write into anger today, because that’s not the place that I’m in. At least not today. My most profound anger came after losing Iris. After losing Nelle, I was mostly just sad. Devastated. Shocked. And quickly had to pick up the pieces when I became pregnant

Betrayal

Over the past several months, people have said things to me in the realm of “you’re so strong” or “you are handling this so well” or “you have inspired me.” Most of the time I feel undeserving, bandaged together by medication and therapy, hardly like I am handling this