Musings Out Loud

Musings Out Loud

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abstract watercolor illustration of a woman looking outside on a rainy day

I Have to Be Raw

I'm not reciting from a script: I'm reliving my experience.

abstact watercolor illustration of a cozy blanket thrown over a blue couch

A Month of Sickness and Writing

I'm exhausted. The most tired I've been in a long time.

abstract watercolor illustration of a twisted and dying tree

Hiding From the News

I live this way because I don't have a choice.

a watercolor illustration of balloons floating above the iconic Disney World castle

A Magical Day

Cheers to the next 40.

abstract watercolor illustration of a black cat in a field

The Universe Aligned Today

A momentous day indeed.

an abstact watercolor illustration of an empty journal sitting on a table

The Writing That's Missing

Lately I've been thinking about the words I didn't write.

Watercolor illustration of a longhair black-and-white cat

Missing and Heartbroken

This constant state of limbo is incredibly hard.

abstract watercolor illustration of a 6 year old girl standing at the edge of a pond

And Now Six

Sometimes the choice not to continue results in grief.

Abstract watercolor illustration of circles, lines, and other shapes

A Lifetime of Creative Work

I need to find that balance between pushing myself and still enjoying the process.

Watercolor illustration of an empty chair in a doctor's office

We Need Better Care

Stillbirth rates are high in the U.S. We know the risk factors and new legislation aims to address them.

Watercolor illustration of a swirling, dusty wind

The Quality of Air

The air quality in our area has improved and is mostly back to normal. But it feels like a foreshadowing of things to come.

watercolor illustration of a claw foot bathtub filled with water

Conversations in a Bathtub

Talking to my rainbow baby about her sisters.

Watercolor illustration of two women in the distance walking on a winding path through a field

The Winding Journey of Friendship

Friendships are wonderful and hard.

Illustration of tulips scattered on a wooden floor

Unsure of What Comes Next

That's the thing about trauma. It makes you afraid and constantly think of worst-case scenarios.

Abstract watercolor of a blue and rust colored wave

Sad That It's Not Sad

We focus so much on mourning.

Black and white sketch drawing of a writer's compass

A Tattoo of Memories

Seven hours of pain later, I have a new tattoo.

abstract watercolor illustration of a lonely tree near a small pond in a clearing

A Missed Opportunity

Is it worth giving up a potentially uncomfortable moment for so many moments of regret later?

watercolor illustration of a notebook on the ground with a fountain pen and a feather

Consistent and Persistent

I'm not going anywhere.

An old oak tree in early spring with no leaves on the branches, watercolor art

Tangled Branches

My screams are combined with a sobering numbness.

A watercolor image of an open book on a table

Words in the World

I feel like I've found what I'm meant to be doing.

A watercolor painting of a multi-colored birthday cake

The Best Birthday

I was trying to make up for three years of missed birthday joys.

A classroom with desks and a shattered window, watercolor

Intruder

The school may do everything right and it may still not be enough to keep the kids safe.

A bouquet of irises, watercolor

The Ups and Downs of a Week

Last weekend, I had a nightmare.

a shattered mirror, watercolor

It Has Been Seven Years

I write about my pain to let other women know that they're not alone.